show me the way ;

Sunday, August 31, 2008

~ 4:30 AM ~

what I have done could be more than others
because of my character and sometimes over-worrying
but whether my actions are appreciated by everyone is another matter
it seemed to me that what I do is 理所当然
which is kind of irritating at times
I don't really expect much to show the appreciation and even a simple thanks is heart-warming

What does significance means to you?
Does it mean making known to the public?
or receiving a compliment/reward what you have done?
or just a simple thanks which is said when others don't even know when it is being said?
seeing the rest putting so much effort in others' events while putting less effort in mine
it really makes me wonder whether what I am in their eyes
when there is something to be done, I had to do it
when something happened, I will be the last to know
when you are bored, I will be the one to entertain you and after which, being cast aside
when you need someone to accompany, I will be the one to accompany you and after which, being cast aside again
when something has happened to me, no one bothers to know the details
when you need entertainment, my emo entries are the sources and it becomes a joke
all these things although minor, but it really does matters
small things after all are the building blocks of big things
although there are times that i am being remembered, i really appreciate the thought
and I am not trying to make things sour or what
they are just my thoughts and maybe I should make them known for such matters

since the time I realised it, i had this feeling that it was bound to happen
they say "absence makes the heart grows fonder"
I believe after this week, it will happen soon

oh well, forget about what I said
i doubt things are going to be changed because of this post
unless someone is able to read between the lines and be the catalyst of the change

~ 4:24 AM ~

We went out to celebrate Aaron's and Wendy's birthdays on Friday and it was quite sometime since I last saw all of them together at a time. Really enjoy such time together as it just adds on to my collection of wonderful memories. (Sounds gay but I don’t really care) We spent some time deciding on where to go because it was raining and another thing is there wasn't a main activity to do before dinner time. At last, we decided on cycling at East Coast Park. It was supposed to be a happy event until when we were on the way back to the bicycle shop. Felicia,Wendy,Sarah, Xu Tat fell and Felicia had the worst injury. I was shocked then because she had her face directly on the floor and I thought she had a face injury. Luckily, it was only her knee and there was some passer-by who had a first aid box with them. It was really kind of them to stop by and helped Felicia dress her wound. After cycling, we went to a food centre near Aaron's house and it was simply a simple yet wonderful dinner. There were fried oyster omelette, ngoh hiang, satay, BBQ stingray and rojak. That excludes the main food that we ordered. So it was really a "eat to your heart's content" dinner. Lols!

After dinner, we went to a basketball court and played 3 9 vs 8 matches. Everyone was playing the ball games seriously until there were a number of injuries and of course, blisters for those who played bare-footed (including me =x). I think Clement had the worst injury as he further worsened his previous injured left leg. He needed the support from Zehui and Chester to walk from the basketball court to the overhead bridge. After that, we went home and it was seriously a tiring day.

Take care Clement, Felicia and to those who are slightly injured.

A picture tells a thousand words. =)

~ 3:42 AM ~

Friday was MJC's Teachers' Day celebration and a group of us decided to bake some cookies for the class to eat. Well, I volunteered to let them use my house oven since no one seemed to offer. But they had to come over to my house at around 12am because I had bowling at Yishun until 10.30pm and by the time I reached home, it was already 11.15pm.

When they reached my house, Germaine and Sok Peng were like asking for a tour around my house because they came to my house for the first time. So both of them, Vincent Bai, Vincent Leong and the rest went around, looking. After that, we started baking the cookies according to Sok Peng's recipe. The cookies were nice as they were crispy and best of all, they were chocolate chip cookies! Chocolates are nice okay.. Lols.

Then the girls went to sleep and some of the boys continued baking more cookies and making of the sandwiches. In the end, I only managed to catch 45min worth of nap but the worst are Yi Long and Song Yang who didn't even catch a wink.

The party was rather fun with a couple moments of laughter. We had sparkling juice and shouted "yam seng" for 4 times. One for the teachers, one for Mrs Chin's due-to-born baby, one for good results and another one for a reason that I forgot. =x Had a class photo before everyone started leaving to meet their secondary school friends. I also left with Kenji and Xiaoqian since I was going to meet Aaron, Zehui they all for Aaron's and Wendy's birthday celebration.

Some photos taken during the baking cookies process and the Teachers' Day party.

Vincent, Sok Peng and Daniel with the dough

They looked serious in placing the dough on the tray. Lol

Baking in the process

Vincent Bai's and Daniel's creation

Cups up and shout!

After all the shoutings

Monday, August 25, 2008

~ 11:55 PM ~

I was looking through the documents in my account on the computer
and I found this text document that someone sent to me at the beginning of the year
he told me that his friend (girl) smsed him in a way that was totally different from usual and she treated him like a stranger now
well, of course I am not going to say to who these 2 persons are
it seems so similar to what I have been experiencing since the start of the year
was it because I expect too much?
I am not finding any excuses but I feel that what I expect is rather simple
so what's the problem and whom does it lies with?
I wish to know but there isn't any source.....

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

~ 6:00 PM ~

it seems only like yesterday that we started talking to each other
but today, we behaves as though we are strangers
i was there, keeping quiet and listening to them as they talk
no common topic at all
i still miss those days where we talk like as though we know each other for a long time
but those days are after all those days
what was the cause of this?
it could be the CCA?
the system?
the different timetable?
the timings?
as much as i have tried to mix in
they after all spend more time with one another more and i am just a..
did i made a wrong choice for doing something external?
if i didn't choose that, i would have joined them and having the fun that i longed to have
within CCA, there should be a bond or something?
what kind of bond is there in that "B" CCA?
or was it because I was from an uniformed group so my expectations were high?
that past 4 years that i had was simply indescribable
looking at the wallpaper on my computer, i still can remember the fun we had on the last day of the overseas trip
the laughter in the bus and those speeches that made us weep
such things don't seem to happen in here at all
it seems that the only thing that will accompany us through rain and shine is our notes
maybe i am wrong and i don't mind being corrected
what it appears to me may not be what it appears to you
after all, everyone has their own viewpoints

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

~ 9:52 PM ~

Hello. I just realised that I have not blogged for the past 1 week? So just coming in to do some updating. Have been busy with a lot of tests like Physics test, Math test and Chemistry SPA A Level Exam. Is like I did study and I am still failing like mad. I seriously don't know what else must I do to like maybe pass? I did the questions in TYS to prepare for the Physics test and practiced the questions again in the tutorial for the Math test. Although I yet to get back the Math test, but I have a strong feeling that I will fail. Hais.

Last Friday, I went for NPCC training. In the middle of the training, Kah Hwee came and he told me that it was boring in school that day because all the teachers were only giving our the results. He told me his projects/coursework were like A or B+? It seems so easy to score in Polytechnic and yet almost all of us are struggling in JC. It doesn't make sense at all or maybe to me.

But luckily today, I had an ego booster or whatever you call it. My GP teacher said that my essay was quite good and could have gotten 32/50 if my stand was the opposite one. I read through my essay again and I just realised that the points against my original stand were much more stronger that the points for my stand. Lol. I hope this continues and that I won't be worrying so much about GP like what I did for the past 8 months or so.

那些笑声与欢笑虽然是短暂
可是那每一份每一秒，我一定会珍惜
因为我不知道还有哪一天我们会再有这些欢笑
不能把事情当作理所当然
希望我和你们能够一起享受今年和明年

Monday, August 11, 2008

~ 1:26 AM ~

I didn't realise until now that I had a number of photos in my phone that I initially wanted to post on the blog but I had cleanly forgotten about it. So, here they are. Yup.

4B gathering in June'08!

the unglam sight of Michelle climbing the gate =x

Found this in school. Its kinda -.-

When i am doing math. 2 calculators with 5 sets of papers. Lol.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

~ 9:17 PM ~

it just ain't fair
all I want was..
but is it that difficult?
how nice it would be if things can go your way
or at least almost close to what you want
I don't ask for much
but also don't take my kindness as 理所当然

当你不可以得到你所要的东西或事
而别人能得到的时候
你会不知不觉地感到有一点妒嫉
但你又不可以做任何事来改变事实
这种感受真得不好受
我不是不想把这些事给忘掉
而是这些事早已在我脑海中，深深地“种”在那里了
算了吧
我只能默默地...

Sunday, August 03, 2008

~ 1:24 PM ~

如果“不能说的秘密”是真的，

我一定会学如何弹钢琴。

学如何弹 Secret（慢版），

回到过去，

把我的过错改掉，

认识多一点人，尤其是 NPCC 的

那么，我现在就可以和他们更容易讲话

但是，那故事是不会实现的

所有美好的事情都得付出代价的

我所付出的代价，也许是的确高了一点

可是，我再也无法挽回

有时候，我真得很想像他一样

和他人的关系那么的要好

好像看到谁，就能找话题讲

永远会有东西讲似的

天啊！真的有一点妒嫉他！

但是，每个人都有自己的特点

我的特点，也许根本不存在

好悲哀哦

~ 3:58 AM ~

You are The Emperor

Stability, power, protection, realization; a great person.

The Emperor is the great authority figure of the Tarot, so it represents
fathers, father-figures and employers. There is a lot of aggression and violence
too.

The Emperor naturally follows the Empress. Like an infant, he is filled with enthuiasm, energy, aggression. He is direct, guileless and all too often irresistible. Unfortunately, like a baby he can also be a tyrant. Impatient, demanding, controlling. In the best of circumstances, he signifies the leader that everyone wants to follow, sitting on a throne that indicates the solid foundation of an Empire he created, loves and rules with intelligence and enthusiasm. But that throne can also be a trap, a responsibility that has the Emperor feeling restless, bored and discontent.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

FYI: I didn't purposely get this but I just did the test and got this.